Relationships

Bismi Allah

Anas relates that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "None of you truly believes until he loves for his brother what he loves for himself."
[Sahih al-Bukhari and Sahih Muslim]

Mu'amalaat is the term used essentially to describe the relationships or dealings we have with people, while ibadah refers to our relationship with our Creator, or simply worship. It is strongly emphasized in Islam that Muslims strive to develop their character. Actually, that's an understatement. A Muslim with a bad character strays far from the teachings of Islam, and is sadly mistaken if he/she thinks otherwise. It is an absolute neccessity that Muslims continuously work to develop themselves in an effort to at least try to follow the way of the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) and the righteous people of the past (may God's mercy be upon them all).

When I think about how the world is sometimes, including all the different relationships that I have (including as a daughter, sister, niece, cousin, friend, etc.), I can't help but feel that my character is off the mark. When I think of the above hadith, I can't help but wonder why I fail in acheiving it. I would almost be inclined to say that these days such a love is not possible because it means one has to be 'sincerely selfless' instead of 'politely self sacrificing.' I figured if such a relationship were possible today then it should be first visible between parents and children, but it's not (but then again, that's a unique relationship in itself). Perhaps then husbands and wives have the honour of experiencing such a profound relationship, after all, God Most High has said that He puts love and mercy between their hearts. It is true. They do share a bit more of this, at least at the beginning of marriage before Shaytan has set to work. But still, I know of many who don't have this. Perhaps it's opposing the wisdom of this hadith by adopting selfishness that accounts for the rising rates of divorce amongst Muslims. Allah knows best.

But I must confess, I do know what this feels like. It has nothing to do with the devleopment of my character, but rather it is a blessing from Allah. Though I fail in my gratitude too, I readily acknowledge that I've been blessed to know that such a love, at least in a lesser degree, can still exist.

Thank you Allah.